Author: Vernon J

I know some of you have been here, done this. But maybe not.

I’m trying to get all my Livejournal friends’ locations plotted on a map – please add your location starting with this form. Username: (Then get your friends to!)

This is funny, http://www.demonoid.com/torrents/details/214306/. You have to dl a bit torrent client. I use ABC doesn’t take up much memory. Have fun watching it.

http://www.angeloplessas.com/elasticenthusiastic/

I think one of the highest games ever. I got 3 yahtees(all 100 points) most of the lower score except for 4 of a kind. Plus the bonus 35 points.

So Alisha and Jared are getting married, and Ellen is planning/paying for there wedding. Alisha goes to this store in Cincinatti(or how ever you spell that town), Her friend tells her to try on this $6000 Wera Vang wedding dress. Salesperson jumps in between them and says that she can’t try it on, friend ask why. Salesperson says that we have dresses from $200 to $10,000, and we can’t let just anybody try them on. Seems reasonable to her, boy was she stupid. Alisha and Jared goes back to Ellen, tells the story. Wera Vang calls up the girl and is going to give her a personal sales tour. I hope that salesperson doesn’t work on commission, and I hope she watches Ellen. 2 words… Fucking Retard.

This is the sweetest phone on the market, (ie I just saw the commercial today and it looked sweet) I wish NEXTEL or Sprint was selling this phone. http://us.lge.com/VX9800/

Three men died in a car accident and met Jesus himself at the Pearly Gates.

The Lord spoke unto them saying, “I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth I will allow you into heaven, but if you lie….Hell is waiting for you.

To the first man the Lord asked, “How many times did you cheat on your wife?” The first man replied, “Lord, I was a good husband. I never cheated on my wife.” The Lord replied, “Very good! Not only will I allow you in, but for being faithful to your wife I will give you a huge mansion and a limo for your transportation.

To the second man the Lord asked, “How many times did you cheat on your wife?” The second man replied, “Lord, I cheated on my wife twice.” The Lord replied, “I will allow you to come in, but for your unfaithfulness, you will get a four- bedroom house and a BMW.

To the third man the Lord asked, “So, how many times did you cheat on your wife?” The third man replied, “Lord, I cheated on my wife about 8 times.” The Lord replied, “I will allow you to come in, but for your unfaithfulness, you will get a one-room apartment, and a Yugo for your transportation.

A couple hours later the second and third men saw the first man crying his eyes out. “Why are you crying?” the two men asked. “You got the mansion and limo!” The first man replied, “I’m crying because I saw my wife a little while ago, and she was riding a skateboard.

Watching Surface on NBC, a girl is teasing a guy(sexual). But she really didn’t like him, her friends put her up to it as a prank. Well she had this small pet, and the boy’s alien species at the small pet. That is funny, she should have never fucked with him.

You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are “Gentlemen, start your engines.” This is so funny, I have seen it before, but it is still funny. I was laughing my ass off this chair. Everyone needs to check this out, http://www.fortogden.com/foredneck.html